BOSS
Ali, I want you to take this case that will force you to confront something about yourself or our relationship.
ANY FEMALE CHARACTER
And I’ll appear to be against you throughout, but at the end I’ll come in with some sister solidarity.
ALI
Will I get to pout lots?
BOSS
Of course.
ALI
Will it all seem too much for me, and I’ll have to go walking in the rain on my own?
BOSS
Undoubtedly.
ALI
But then right near the end will someone say something that will show me the answer? And I’ll use some cute legal argument that wouldn’t stand up in a real court but will get the case sorted out as long as you don’t analyse it.
BOSS
Absolutely.
ALI
And at some point I’ll end up in that Yuppie bar where that drag-act woman will perform some bland cover version?
BOSS
You know that. You’ve read her contract.
ALI
And him what’ll he be doing.
GRAPHIC ARTIST
At some point, I’ll be representing a metaphor in a blatant form for those people who really don’t get metaphors. Like this.
A cartoon cat runs out of a cartoon bag.
GRAPHIC ARTIST
Did you see what I did?
ALI
You let the cat out of the bag.
GRAPHIC ARTIST
Absolutely.
ALI
Well, I'd better get on with it. Should I hitch my skirt up higher?
BOSS
If you hitched it any higher, it would be a corset. And another thing...
ALI
What?
ALL OTHERS
Eat some fucking food!!
END OF SCENE ONE.
September 1999, Peter More.